First, a clarification – Rip Torn has the best celebrity arrest of all time. The man’s a genius. He’s untouchable.

He’s 78 years old and he broke into a bank, holding a loaded gun, because he was so drunk that he thought it was his own house. Nobody on the face on the planet has ever done anything that brilliant. Rip Torn, we want you to be our grandpa.

But, although he has the best celebrity arrest in history, he hasn’t got the only celebrity arrest in history. Celebrities literally can’t stop getting arrested and, since celebrities are on average 15 times stupider than normal people, their arrests are often quite hilarious. Take a look…

10 – Naomi Campbell

There are places where you’re allowed to be a bit angry. Boxing rings, for instance. Or pub car parks. But planes? No. Act out of line on a plane and you could end up being attacked by dogs. Or  getting shot at. Or someone might stick their fingers up your bum. Not that Naomi Campbell cared about any of that in 2008, when she went berserk over some lost luggage and ended up lashing out at a policeman. She’s a lovely girl really.

9 – The Game

You don’t hear much from The Game these days, do you? That’s either because a) the only way he could have picked a less Google-friendly nameis if he called himself The, or b) because he’s not very good. Still, at least he’ll always go down in history as being the rapper with the stupidest arrest story of all. Drugs? No. Guns? No. Putting on a Halloween mask in a shopping centre and swearing so loudly that he ended up getting pepper-sprayed? Um, yes. The Game, you are a genius.

8 – Hugh Grant

Getting a blowjob from a prostitute? Forgiveable. Getting a blowjob from a prostitute when you’ve already got a girlfriend? Less forgiveable. Getting a blowjob from a prostitute in a car in front of a policeman? Stupid. Getting a blowjob from a prostitute in a car in front of a policeman when your girlfriend is Liz Hurley? Hugh Grant, you really can be an awful wazzock.

7 – Lindsay Lohan

Anyone can get arrested. Some people can even get arrested for getting drunk and driving a car full of terrified passengers around. A choice handful might even have cocaine in their pockets as they do it. But only Lindsay Lohan, only dear sweet Lindsay Lohan, would preface all of this by screaming “I’m a celebrity, I can do whatever the fuck I want” just to make it perfectly clear that she isn’t very likeable, as she did in 2007. For that, Lindsay, we thank you. Sort of.

6 – Paul Reubens

When you watch Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, you don’t ever get the impression that Pee-Wee is the sort of person who’d be arrested for wanking in a cinema, do you? Well apparently he is. Ick.

5 – George Michael

When you watch a George Michael video, you don’t ever get the impression that George is the sort of person who’d be arrested for wanking in a public toilet, would… oh, yes. Yes you would. Sorry.

4 – Foxy Brown

It takes a very special woman to make Naomi Campbell look approachable and meek, but then again Foxy Brown is a very special woman. Arrested once for fighting the staff of a nail salon over some change, arrested again for trashing a shop because she was trying to fix her hair while it was closing, and arrested yet again for smashing her neighbour’s face in with a BlackBerry, Foxy Brown doesn’t do anything by halves. Apart from rapping, obviously. She isn’t particularly good at that if we remember correctly.

3 – Gary Coleman

As with Foxy Brown, Gary Coleman is a tiny, past-his-prime human with a penchant for ridiculous arrests. But the most ridiculous, even more ridiculous than the time he was arrested for punching the inside of his own car, came during an evening out at a bowling alley. A man asked to take a picture of Gary Coleman, and Coleman refused on the basis that photos of him cost $20. The man tried to take one anyway and, in the ensuing scuffle, Gary Coleman knocked him over with a truck. Not a toy truck, either – a real, full-sized truck. And that’s how we fell in love with Gary Coleman again.

2 – Mel Gibson

You all know the story, so we’ll just cut to the chase and give you the wonderful quote instead: “My life is fucked. I’m not going to get in your car… You motherfucker. I’m going to fuck you… Fucking Jews… The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world. Are you a Jew?… What do you think you’re looking at, Sugartits?” Perfection.

1 – James Brown

September 1988. We’ll quote this one from The Guardian:

James Brown, toting pistol and shotgun, marched into an insurance seminar next door to his offices in Augusta, pissed off that someone had used his toilet without permission. Cops were called and a chase ensued over the state line into South Carolina. After 23 bullets were emptied into his tyres, Brown finally emerged from his vehicle – allegedly singing ‘Georgia on My Mind’.

Oh James Brown, why can’t your ghost come and haunt us, you mental old sod.

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Kim Kardashian's gigantic ass and chewtoy/boyfriend—New Orleans Saints player Reggie Bush—descend on Miami. Let Diddy be Diddy. Madonna's vagina is funny. Kristen Stewart got someone fired. Tiger Woods: excited to jack off? Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup.

• Somebody looked at a reservations book and decided that Reggie Bush and Kim Karashain—who's now famous for not just having a big ass and a sex tape, but for dating Reggie Bush and being punched in the face as well—were having the last dinner before Reggie's Big Game tomorrow in Miami at Prime 112. They might be right, because also in attendance were Jerry "The Cryptkeeper" Jones, Alex "Centaur Special" Rodriguez, David Spade, and Chris Rock. Remember Saints fans, if you lose, it's Kim's fault. [Page Six]
  
  
• Not exactly the smartest thing you could do: Kristen Stewart—who, for the record, is having sex with Robert Pattinson, Twilight fans. Yes, that Robert Pattinson. Yes: sex.—was a juror in a court case involving an undercover prostitution sting. The defendant was found not guilty! And the security guard policing the trial asked for a photo with Stewart for his daughter. Well, Stewart obliged, and naturally, the photo went up on Facebook, because people can't resist the temptation to show everyone about their brush with fame, even though they're just fucking people they're standing next to. Just other human beings! Anyway, now the guard's probably gonna get fired. Blame it on the fans. Sorry, but: it's true. [People]
  
  
• Madonna's getting a place in East Hampton for the summer, where she and the kid she's babysitting/schtumping, this Jesus guy, they're gonna sit around and do it. All summer. Question: when will Madonna realize that schtumping younger guys doesn't make her younger by Osmosis? Madonna's hanging onto her youth like a Koala being weened of its local eucalyptus high. Except one's kinda cute and the other is just plain sad. For the record, that's the koala. The koala's the cute example, here. [Page Six]
  
  
• Snooki Cookie Snickers Dickers or whatever we're calling her these days, she got booed by Philadelphia. Who boos everyone, but still, good thing they're on their shit, you know?
  
  
• Conrad Murray, the dirty doctor who's going to be charged with killing Michael Jackson on Monday, decided to tip some TMZ photogs off to the fact that he was "seeking peace" at Michael Jackson's tomb, which is a nice way of getting a decent publicity shot a few days before we're all going to see his mug shot. For the record, after Jackson died, I called Murray a sketchball, and a bunch of commenters were like "fuuuuuuuckkk youuuuuu he is SO NOT SKETCHY you are SUCH AN ASSHOLE." To those commenters, I'd like to say: eat a dick. I was right. And you know who defends a sketchball? Other sketchballs. [TMZ]
  
  
• Naomi Campbell's hosting some kind of charity benefit and for $100 a ticket you can buy yourself into the "safe zone" where she won't hurl wireless electronics at your face. Possibly worth the investment. [Page Six]
  
  
• Some chick on The Bachelor is proud to be a virgin. The fact that she's on The Bachelor still doesn't seem to bother her, however. [People]
  
  
• Tiger Woods left sex rehab and is now going to go home and jack off a whole bunch, prolly. [NYDN]
  
  
• Some poor little girl ended up touring with the Jonas Brothers and realized how insane their fans are and now needs years of therapy to deal with it. [People]
  
  
• Jeffrey Chodorow supposedly has the most successful nightlife empire out there. This is funny, because no matter what he does, New York will always think of him as kind of a joke. If anything, the guy can't produce a restaurant deserving of more than one Sympathy Star if his life depended on it, but there will always be assholes, and thus, an audience for Chodorow's stuff. Long Live Kobe Club. [Page Six]
  
  
• Linda Hamilton—who ensured that our children will not be slaves to SkyNet Robots, twice—says she divorced James Cameron because he was a workaholic, and not because he was busy thinking of new ways for ten-foot-tall blue creatures to have sex with plants using their awesome blue dicktails. [NYDN]
  
  
• Anne Hathaway teaches the readers of one of those GQ magazines how to kiss, which is good, because they probably need the help. Seriously. Also, Anne Hathaway is hot. What? What else am I supposed to say about this? She is. It's true. [NYDN]
  
  
• Will Sean Combs ever resist the temptation to act like Sean Combs? Example sighting: "....deplaning a United NY-LA flight with two assistants carrrying his Louis Vuittton luggage to a black Escalade..." No, basically, never. [Page Six]
  
  
• Jamie Lynn Spears is dumping her baby daddy for an older guy. The older guy is probably developmentally disabled in some regard. [NYDN]

Super Bowl weekend, and I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I won't be playing in Sunday's Big Game, as my back is completely messed up. I will, however, be blogging here, and be doing it on a whole bunch of Vicodin. People, believe me when I tell you that blogging is, in fact, a full contact sport, especially if you sit like a very, very interested and possibly farsighted monkey for seven days a week, as my spine is now essentially straight (it's not supposed to be, supposedly) and I can't bend over anymore to be the recipient of various editors' deadlines, which was maybe the idea in the first place. But no, really, I'm going to be on painkillers for most of this weekend, so, this should be fun! Stick around!

[Photo via Getty Images]

We've all seen the ads for D&G's new Fragrance Anthology (Eva Herzigova, Claudia Schiffer, and Naomi Campbell in one photo? Smells like super model status to me!). Channel your inner Naomi with 3: L'Impératrice, a fruity fragrance with hints of melon and kiwi.

D&G L'Impératrice eau de toilette, $65 for 3.3 oz. sephora.com.

-- COURTENAY PHILBRICK

Skip to the beat. Uber-DJ Matt Creed produced, wrote, and creative directed the Olsenboye Spring 2010 campaign, featuring a supercute video directed by Andrew Simkiss! [Olsenboye]

Today in fashion week scoops: A look at Rebecca Taylor, Tracy Reese, Milly, Elie Tahari, and G-Star Fall 2010 sketches! [nitro:licious]

Fashion for Relief: Didn't make the press list? Naomi Campbell's got your golden ticket into the Tent, proceeds to benefit Haiti. [NYT]

Trashbag chic. Looks like Marc Jacobs is following Vivienne Westwood as the next designer to jump on the Galliano bandwagon. [Jezebel]

Couturier-cum-costumer. He may not have been able to show at last week's Couture collections, but Christian Lacroix is keeping up his cultural clout, designing for the Berlin State Opera. [Style File]

Get more fashion news from our favorite blogs here!

Daria Werbowy, Naomi Campbell, and Kate Moss.

Love's third "Fashion Icons" issue has eight covers depicting eight supermodels in the same naked pose. They are Naomi Campbell, Kate Moss, Daria Werbowy, Lara Stone, Janeil Williams, Natalia Vodianova, Kristen McMenamy, and Amber Valletta. They were chosen because they represent "the ideal of beauty in fashion today," according to British Vogue. And Love editor Katie Grand explains that these women were not only chosen and shot naked because that sort of thing sells magazines and gets attention. It goes deeper than that.

"For this issue of LOVE, we took eight women who are generally acknowledged as the most beautiful in the world, got them to show off their bodies — widely regarded as the most perfect in the world — and photographed them all in exactly the same position for the cover," LOVE's editor-in-chief Katie Grand told VOGUE.COM. "We did this to show how much they differed physically from one another, which is why we also printed their measurements."

Grand said the varying measurements of these women prove that "'perfection' is not fixed, timeless or transcendent." So the message is that girls don't have to look the same to be beautiful? But beauty is still generally very tall, very skinny, and essentially flawless? If we feel this good about ourselves looking at these covers, how great will we feel when the issue drops in a week (February 8) and the measurements are revealed?

Beauty Stripped Bare [Vogue UK]

Read more posts by Amy Odell

Filed Under: amber valletta, daria werbowy, janeil williams, kate moss, katie grand, kristen mcmenamy, lara stone, love, model tracker, models, naomi campbell, natalia vodianova, someones naked!

From the cinematic 'Thriller' to the bank-breaking 'Scream,' Jackson made an indelible impact on music videos.
By James Montgomery

Michael Jackson performing in 1989
Photo: L. Busacca/ Getty Images

It is a loss of immeasurable magnitude. Michael Jackson, arguably the biggest pop-music star of the past quarter-century, unquestionably one of the greatest entertainers of all time, is dead at the age of 50.

A star since age 11, Jackson lived in the spotlight for four decades, selling more albums than any other solo artist not named Elvis and forever changing the worlds of pop, R&B, hip-hop and even rock (check Eddie Van Halen's solo on "Beat It" for proof) in the process. He was a true icon of the entertainment age, an international superstar who spread his fame across screens and stages around the world. He revolutionized the art of choreography, touring, multiplatform promotion and — of course — music videos.

Jackson, who always admired the showmanship of P.T. Barnum and the spectacle of the silver screen, realized the potential of music videos, and he maximized it like no one before (or, really, since).

Michael Jackson made music videos an event. When a new MJ clip premiered, you stayed home and tuned in to see it first — even if it were at midnight, even it were on a Friday. His videos were lavish, big-budget affairs, rife with spectacular choreography, eye-popping special effects and amazing costume changes. Directors like Martin Scorsese and John Landis clamored to work with him, stars like Eddie Murphy and models like Naomi Campbell lined up to make cameos. Jackson didn't so much make music videos as he made movies, in more ways than one.

His crowning achievement was, of course, "Thriller," the video he shot (and co-wrote) with Landis in 1983. Spanning more than 13 minutes and costing more than $500,000 to make (a record at the time), it was a true mini-film, featuring huge sets, makeup by Academy Award winner Rick Baker and incidental music by the legendary Elmer Bernstein. The video's choreography — particularly Jackson's midsong dance spectacle with a troupe of zombies — has gone on to become the most imitated (and parodied) in pop-culture history, and the "Guinness Book of World Records" lists "Thriller" as "The Most Successful Music Video of All Time," having sold more than 9 million units. In 1999, MTV ranked it as the Greatest Music Video Ever Made.

But "Thriller" wasn't his only event video. His 18-minute, Scorsese-directed clip for "Bad" broke the bank again (and featured a cameo by a then-unknown Wesley Snipes). "Smooth Criminal" was used as the centerpiece of his 93-minute "Moonwalker" film and saw Jackson file a patent for "anti-gravity lean" that was fitted inside his loafers. "Black or White" premiered simultaneously in 27 countries, featured ground-breaking "morphing" special effects and kicked up a whole host of controversy due to some aggressive dance moves by Jackson. And "Scream," his high-profile duet with sister Janet, remains the most expensive music video ever shot, with an estimated budget of more than $7 million.

Of course, it wasn't all flash-and-dash with Jackson's videos. His early clips, for songs like "Don't Stop Till You Get Enough," "Billie Jean" and "Beat It," were iconic for their stylized look, Jackson's natty manner of dress and his slick dance moves. And one cannot overstate their cultural importance, either: Jackson was one of the first black artists to gain constant airplay on MTV, and his choreography is responsible for bringing so-called "urban" moves to the masses.

More iconic MJ videos include the celeb-and-special-effect-heavy "Remember the Time" (directed by John Singleton); "Jam," which featured two MJs (Jackson and Michael Jordan) going one on one; and the eye-popping clip for "Blood on the Dancefloor."

Like we said, it's a loss of immeasurable magnitude. Not just for music, but for music videos. We'll never see another star burn as brightly as Michael Jackson.

Tune in to MTV at 9 p.m. ET on Thursday (June 25) for "Michael Jackson: A Tribute." Also, share your memories of the King of Pop by uploading video and comments to Your.MTV.com or joining the discussion below.

Related Videos

• Remembering Michael Jackson
• Michael Jackson's Video Legacy

Related Photos

• Michael Jackson: A Life In Photos

Related Artists

• Michael Jackson

FAD DIETS
• The Food and Drug Administration issued a recall of fourteen Hydroxycut products, and they are warning people to stop taking the over-the-counter diet drug immediately. Hydroxycut has been linked to 23 reports of liver problems, jaundice, and now, at least one death. [Yahoo]

FRAGRANCE
• The campaign for the five new D&G Anthology fragrances — which were inspired by tarot cards — features a steamy mix of supermodels. Mario Testino shot Claudia Schiffer, Eva Herzigova, and Naomi Campbell, as well as male models Fernando Fernandes, Noah Mills, and Tyson Ballou. And they're all naked. Now that's good fortune. [WWD]

• Anne Hathaway dances to Róisín Murphy’s "Ramalama (Bang Bang)" song in the new commercial for Lancôme's Magnifique. [Just Jared]

SKIN
• UV lamps used to dry nails at salons are coming under fire for possibly causing skin cancer and tumors. Two cases of cancer due to nail salons have been reported so far. The University of Texas is investigating, but you kind of suspected the lamps weren't good for you, right? [Daily Mail]

• After spending sixteen minutes in a tanning bed unsupervised, a 10-year-old girl has burns on 70 percent of her body. Medics said that if she had stayed two more minutes, she would need to have skin grafts. But she ran out of money and couldn't go for longer. The girl is not allowed in the sun for ten years. We don't even know where to begin with this. [Independent UK]

HAIR
• Prince Harry admitted in a bar that he hasn't washed his hair in two years. First R-Patz, now Harry. Is it a Brit thing? [Telegraph UK]

Read more posts by Sharon Clott

Filed Under: anne hathaway, beauty, beauty marks, body issues, Claudia Schiffer, Eva Herzigova, fad diets, Fernando Fernandes, fragrance, hair, hydroxycut, Naomi Campbell, Noah Mills, prince harry, skin, Tyson Ballou

Naomi Campbell might have a burgeoning Bollywood career. She has reportedly recorded in Hindi a duet with Indian actor Akshay Kumar. The song is for Jumbo, an animated feature, and Campbell will also star in the song's music video. Naomi has appeared in many movies and music videos in the past, but we think the finest example of her onscreen work is Cool As Ice — perhaps better known as the Vanilla Ice movie — in which she played a singer. She also sings with Vanilla Ice on the track "Cool As Ice" and appears in the music video alongside him. It's break-dancing, neon, early-nineties magic we tell you. If you're ready to transport yourself to 1991, click through.

Bollywood Calling [British Vogue]

Bad news, all unfertilised sperm - the chances of you splattering into one of Naomi Campbell’s ovums has just increased exponentially.

That’s because Naomi Campbell has just recovered from an operation on her baby-making parts that’s allowed her to have children for the first time in her life. And, by God, does Naomi Campbell ever want children - she’s all over the press at the moment basically telling the world that she wants someone to knock her up.

And when Naomi Campbell tell you she wants to get pregnant, you’d better make sure you get her pregnant quicksmart, or else there’ll be trouble. And no looking her in the eye during it. And she’d better not feel it going in, otherwise you’ll be picking shards of Nokia out of your face for the next six months. Understand?

We’ve always thought that Naomi Campbell would be excellent with a baby. Not only because people are infinitely more understanding if an angry demented women happens to be pushing a buggy but also, if Naomi Campbell asks the midwife to leave the umbilical cord nice and long, she could probably use the baby against her enemies by twirling it around her head like some sort of medieval mace for a few years. What’s not to love?

Anyway, Naomi Campbell has managed to tick off most of the boxes on her life’s to-do list - you know, like shag the crap one from U2, infuriate Nelson Mandela, become a pop star in Japan, turn a boat into splinters with just her fists - and the only left is for her to have a baby. And now that could very well happen, apparently.

Remember when Naomi Campbell had her operation in Brazil earlier this year? Back then everyone thought she was just getting a cyst removed from her stomach, but apparently not - apparently they were unclogging her lady-drain. Because where once Naomi Campbell couldn’t have babies, now she’s perfectly able to bang out angry baby after angry baby whenever she likes. And she’d like to now, please. Naomi Campbell told the Press Association:

“Until March, I wasn’t able to have kids. Now I can. I was not able to have children up until March. Now it’s in God’s hands. I would love to have a family but it’s up to God. I do want to have kids. I’m 38 years old.”

That’s not a statement, that’s a Craigslist personal ad. Naomi Campbell then went on to say that her favourite colour is orange and that her hobbies include needlework, attacking her servants until they bleed and daydreaming about the magic in a child’s smile.

But if a child is what Naomi Campbell wants, there’s no reason why she shouldn’t be able to have one. In fact, it’d be quite cool to have Naomi Campbell as a mother, wouldn’t it? She’d teach you all the basic skills like English, maths and spitting on policemen, plus all your teachers would clearly be too terrified of her to ever write anything negative about you in your school report. Not to mention the fact that, being part-Campbell yourself, you’d probably have the strength to javelin a lamppost through the Sun by the time you were about six.

Ultimately, though, if Naomi Campbell does have a baby, there’s going to be a whole lot of screaming and crying and constant demands for attention and accidental shitting going on that’s bound to be highly stressful. But give the baby an few months and it’ll probably get used to it.